Some people make running a freelance business look so easy, touting that 6-figure salary and “passive income”.
They’re booked out for months, they’re posting social content of their beautiful projects every week, and maybe they even call themselves a “boss babe.”
(“Girl boss” has never quite been my language—or my reality.)
And honestly, that kind of branding never felt like it reflected the messy, real work of building a freelance business.
Because here’s the truth no one tells you:
Building a business is harder than it looks on Instagram.
Behind every polished post, there’s the project you didn’t even want anyone to see that you worked on. The pitch that felt brave — of which you ended up being ghosted. The nights spent wondering if it’s time to give up and go find a full-time job.
Those are the real experiences of building a business. Because working for yourself isn’t as easy as just being a “natural.” It’s about learning skills most of us were never taught, and giving yourself the grace to learn them as you go.
Skills like:
- Project management
- Communication
- Boundaries
- Pricing
- Marketing
- Sales
- Financial literacy
- Emotional regulation for when a client ghosts you or a dream project falls through
- Learning to say no, without spiraling
(I didn’t get formal training in any of this. Did you?)
So if you’ve been judging yourself for struggling to get clients or know what to do next…
Please hear this:
Maybe you’re not doing it wrong. Maybe you’re just minding the skill gap.
Not sure what that means? Here’s an example from my own journey: I used to think I was “bad at sales.”
Because honestly? I don’t even like the word “sales.” It always felt pretty ick, like someone saying whatever it takes to close the deal, even if it’s not real.
But that’s one of the gifts of working for yourself:
You get to redefine words like “sales.”
You get to find what feels more human, more grounded, more true to you.
Now, I see sales as relationship-building—and this reframe makes everything feel lighter, simpler, and way more sustainable.
So let me ask you something:
What’s one thing you’ve been judging yourself for…
that might actually be a skill you just haven’t learned yet?
We close the gap through practice.
And from continuing to try—especially when things don’t go as planned.
You’re learning.
So if you take nothing else from this email, take this: You’re doing far better than you think.
Sarah
P.S. One of my favorite reminders about minding the gaps comes from Ira Glass, who talks about the “gap” between our creative taste and our creative ability. If you haven’t seen it, here’s a short (and lovely) 2-minute video: